It’s A Numbers Game

So..last night Belle and I had the “numbers” talk. You know the one. The one that sinks otherwise unsinkable ships. The “so what have you done and how many times have you done it” talk. Have you had this talk? If you haven’t do not have this talk. This is not a good talk. Nothing good can come from this talk. Inevitably comparisons are made and apparently for men AND women the competitive juices began to flow.

It was definitely eye-opening on both sides. We plowed through the Too Much Information barrier like a runaway freight train cutting thru melted butter…downhill….on a greased track…loaded with coal. It started off innocently enough. A few easy questions purely for entertainment value. Unfortunately simple questions occasionally require clarification which means divulging details that you may or may not want to know.

Disclaimer - Let me make it perfectly clear Belle’s number was actually quite low. It was only surprisingly in the sense that I naively assumed that I knew everything already…well I missed a couple.

Obviously being older (and a guy) my number was much higher than Belle’s. However taking my age into account I think my number is quite reasonable. She was not overly pleased about this revelation. I think what bothered her most was the fact that all of them, save one or two, were essentially hit & runs or friends w/benefits situations. She was and still is concerned about being “flavor of the month” or worse…yet another temporary diversion from the loneliness of daily life. One would think the fact that we have been involved on some level for nearly two years now would enough to assuage those fears but apparently not. Besides…it wasn’t for lack of trying. Actually it was but I digress.
When it’s all said and done the truth is we have absolutely no reason to be envious of anyone in our SO’s past. They are in the past for good reason. If they were really that fantastic they’d still be where you are right now. Leave it at that. Trust me on this one, folks. Thank you and good night.