Signs He Wants to Get Laid

Posted by Dubbayoo | Filed under General, Jokes

  • Watching a nature show where animals fornicate, he keeps winking and doing the eyebrow thing.
  • When you ask him what kind of car he likes to drive, he solemnly replies, “The skin bus to tuna town,” and then laughs until he cries.
  • You note that integrity is so important in a man, he notes that what he looks for in a “chick” is “you know.”
  • He whispers,”you’re beautiful,” to your thighs, then glances up at your face and says, “oh you, too.”
  • When you comment on the rarity of men these days who seek mature relationships, he giggles quite a bit.
  • In conversation with others, he refers to you as his “quality tail.”
  • Washing dishes after you’ve cooked him dinner for the first time, you reach behind you to take the paper towels off the paper-towel rod and then realize that you don’t own a paper-towel rod.
  • When you’re insulted by his “motel” suggestion at the end of your first date, he looks impressed and says, “hotel.”
  • When you proudly recount your glorious high school valedictory speech to him, he praises “your multi-talented mouth.”
  • When you tell him what you do for a living, he stares at your breasts and loudly asks, “What do they do?”

Permalink | February 24th, 2006

5 Responses to “Signs He Wants to Get Laid”

  1. Belle Says:
    February 24th, 2006 at 2:31 pm

    You missed one: He buys flowers hoping it earns him enough points so he can score.

  2. D_T Says:
    February 24th, 2006 at 3:37 pm

    You just wait, girlie.

  3. Belle Says:
    February 24th, 2006 at 4:23 pm

    Would it be worth my while to wait or should I just go ahead and quit holding my breath?

  4. D_T Says:
    February 24th, 2006 at 5:13 pm

    If you’re not turning 4 shades of purple and scaring coworkers keep going.

  5. Belle Says:
    February 24th, 2006 at 6:25 pm

    If there’s steam coming out of my ears, does that count?