Feb
16

Reasons a Vibrator is Better Than a Man

Steve on February 16th, 2006
  • A vibrator’s only function is to please you.
  • They don’t watch televised sports when you want to talk.
  • They don’t talk when you want to watch a movie on TV.
  • You’ll never have to put your vibrator in your mouth.
  • Vibrators never pick their nose in bed.
  • Vibrators move.
  • Vibrators find all the right spots.
  • Vibrators don’t do household chores— but you don’t care.
  • A vibrator never leaves you or flirts with your friends.
  • Vibrators never make a mess.
  • You never worry about where your vibrator has been before.
  • A vibrator will never call out someone else’s name when it is with you.
  • A vibrator will never ask you to bring it a beer.
  • Even if your vibrator is working overtime, you know exactly where it is.
  • A vibrator is easy to turn on and off.
  • You can spend hours in a bar with your vibrator, and it will still be able to perform when you get it home.
  • A vibrator doesn’t care how long it takes to satisfy you.
  • Your mother will never ask what your vibrator does for a living.
  • A vibrator won’t get pissed of when dinner isn’t cooked.
  • Vibrators can’t get you pregnant, give you a disease, or make you watch auto racing.
  • Vibrators take up very little room on the bed.
  • Vibrators never bother you when you want to sleep.
  • Vibrators never compare size with other vibrators.
  • You’ll never have to share your vibrator with another woman.
  • Your vibrator doesn’t mind if you forget to shave.
  • Vibrators never fart in bed.
  • A vibrator won’t turn off before you finish.
  • It is ok to have more than one vibrator in bed with you at a time.
  • If you have a headache or your period, you won’t find a vibrator turned on when you get into bed.
  • Vibrators are ALWAYS hard.
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6 Responses to “Reasons a Vibrator is Better Than a Man”

  1. Belle
    February 16th, 2006 at 3:52 pm

    Two words: Credit card.

  2. D_T
    February 16th, 2006 at 4:04 pm

    one word..pajamas. My name ain’t Rockefeller.

  3. Belle
    February 16th, 2006 at 7:19 pm

    One word: Withholding.

  4. D_T
    February 16th, 2006 at 7:32 pm

    Two back…irresistable charms. :-)

  5. Belle
    February 17th, 2006 at 2:16 pm

    Two more words: Not yours.

  6. taylor
    March 11th, 2006 at 1:36 pm

    This is so funny and a lot of reasons too i really liked the one that says it can’t get you pregnat or amke you watch auto racing.

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